Pondering

On Sunday night, the subject of the debt of love came up. That we owe love to each other in the body of believers.
So how much should we expect from other's? Or to what extent does that love go? Do we stop at a certain point, or should we be so willing to even change our schedules, plans, or lifestyles, to help somebody, or show them the love that Jesus talks about?

Drifting

Have you ever felt like your mind was so far away from your body, that you forget what you were doing at that moment in time??

Girl that's after

Only human,
nothing more,
why must you go after,
again agian.

You said you didn't feel,
the way I thought you did,
in the end
you were wrong.

Taking again,
what shouldn't be yours,
trying to slip in,
not noticed, accepted.

Runnung after,
what runs away,
what keeps you going,
never known.

Where is your mind,
did it run away,
you head not there,
at random.

My beef

What I find very anoying to me is when people send me off to do something, without telling me how to do it!!
People will tell me seek God, he will comfort you, and as much as I know that, I am new to a lot of this stuff ans I am trying to figure stuff out... why don't people tell me how to do it, or what their experiences are before they leave me stranded not knowing what to do...

Well that's my beef...:P

Inside

The world around shatters,
pain is all that's felt,
death an infliction,
hidden inside a cave.

Anger a foundation,
of actions that arise,
longing to find,
an understaning.

Peace no longer present....
Signs, escape, wonder....
unpleasent sight....
filth...

My song

Well, I've just been pondering these lyrics for awhile now actually...dig in..

There's a song in my heart,
There's a song in my soul,
Of your great love,
And How I long for more.

Your worthiness, never changes,
Your soverign grace, never deminishes,
Through ths storm, my heart still longs to worship,
Send your flood, to wash away unworthiness.

There's a yerning in my heart,
There's a longing in my soul,
A faithful heart be mine,
And for your light to show.

In the depths of my heart,
When I feel afraid,
I still choose to worship

When you seem far away
and I just dont' understand

When dispair is in my heart,
And doubt is in my my soul,
Remind me of your blessings,
And I'll praise you through this storm.

Prasie you, Hallelujah!

Amen.

Voice of truth

I find it very interesting how we tend to sift through suff we hear and belive to find what we want to hear or what feels okay or good.
I think this goes hand in hand, when we can be so consumed by what we think is right or true, and yet be blinded and miss what really was true and right.
We live in a world that says that we shoud follow what we think is right, but really how can we justify anything if everyone did what they thought was right, when it could be totally wrong?
I mean how far, and how sucessful is anyone who goes by their own truth?
It could include anything such as that they see stealing as okay, and a true thing to do, and yet is it right, or even close to the actual truth?
Can anyne of us actually say what is "true" unless we have taken it from God's word?

Word of God speak

I'm finding myself at a loss for words
And the funny thing is it's okay
The last thing I need is to be heard
But to hear what
You would say

Word of God speak
Would You pour down like rain
Washing my eyes to see
Your majesty
To be still and know
That You're in this place
Please let me stay and rest
In Your holiness
Word of God speak

I'm finding myself in the midst of
YouBeyond the music, beyond the noise
All that I need is to be with You
And in the quiet hear Your voice

Darkest Hour

Today I was reminded about praising God in our darkest hours. If you really think about it, how easy is it to praise God when it's sunny outside, and life is going great? Anyone can sing praises to God when things are all good, happy and sunny, but your faith really shows when you praise God the toughest storms.

I can't remember the scripture, however, there were these two men who were sent out to preach and tell people the way to be saved. However, along their journey they get thrown into jail because they were accused of causing an uproar, due to casting out a demon from girl who could predict the future, making huge profits for her owners. They were severely flogged and tortured, and thrown into the deepest darkest cell of the jail. And yet despite all that was going on, they sung praises to God in their Darkest hour. Now that's faith!

It just gets me thinking.... and makes me see what real faith is!

Another world??

Well, things have been quite weird for me in the last week or so. Just things seem to be everywhere, and not in their place, which brings about a feeling of unsettledness. Like I am in another world, somebody else's. I wonder what's going to happen, where I am going to be next. If I do well in things, and succeed in things of the future...

I am trying to look to the Lord for strength and wisdom. I pray that he will just cover me with a feeling of security and comfort.

Dance

I am preparing for a solo dance that I am doing at my school dance performance, and I can't help but feel some anxiety as I am preparing with such little time... I had been off for a little while, due to a knee injury and I just got back to it not too long ago. I am kinda freaking out tho because I only have less than two weeks before the performance and it's not done yet.. So, please pray that God will fill with me the holy spirit as I prepare my dance, heart and mind...
For the LORD's love is extravagant!

Today....

Today I am pondering God's reasoning for things... sometimes I just sit and wonder why things happen and why the things I dream of aren't coming true, even though I pray with all my heart. Aware that these things must fall under God's will for my life, sometimes, things seem dull and dreary as they are not anything I want. Only time will tell, and in the end I will see these things work out to God's plan.. but it's so hard when you don't see the end product or have no idea what will happen next or what tomorrow will bring. The comfort of knowing what will happen sometimes feels as if it has been robed from us, and makes us feel very down and discouraged, making it hard to "trust" in God. However trust comes in not know the future, and deciding that regardless of what the future holds, we are in God's hands.
Just some thoughts, would love to hear what everyone thinks.

Understanding

It truly amazes me how people can be so blinded as to how things are. Sometimes, as well as tonight I just feel frustrated, as people just assume things are one way, when they aren't in the situation, and judge it by how it looks, all wrapped in pretty paper, that may be slightly riped, however still looks pretty great.
Its so hard now these days to find someone who will believe you and understand that the way a situation is, is not what they think. That there is so much hidden, and that can't be explained only experienced.

Rescue....

This song is my cry to the LORD...

You are the source of life
And I can't be left behind
No one else will do
I will take hold of you

I need You Jesus
To come to my rescue
Where else can I go
There's no other name by
Which I am saved
Capture me with Love

My heart is yours for life
And I need your hand in mine
No one else will do
I put my trust in you

I will follow you
This world has nothing for me.

I just need the LORD to rescue me, from all my fears and worries, and just this world....

Made to worship

Before the day
Before the light
Before the world revolved around the sun
God on high
Stepped down into time
And wrote the story of His love for everyone

He has filled our hearts with wonder
So that we always remember

You and I were made to worship
You and I are called to love
You and I are forgiven and free
You and I embrace surrender
You and I choose to believe
You and I will see who we were meant to be

All we are
And all we have
Is all a gift from God that we receive
Brought to life
We open up our eyes
To see the majesty and glory of the King

He has filled our hearts with wonder
So that we always remember

You and I were made to worship
You and I are called to love
You and I are forgiven and free
You and I embrace surrender
You and I choose to believe
You and I will see who we were meant to be

And even the rocks cry out
And even the Heavens shout
At the sound of His holy name
So let every voice sing out
And let every knee bow down
He is worthy of all our praise

You and I were made to worship
You and I are called to love
You and I are forgiven and free, yeah
You and I embrace surrender
You and I choose to believe
You and I will see, you and I will see

You and I were made to worship
You and I are called to love
You and I are forgiven and free, yeah
You and I embrace surrender
You and I choose to believe
You and I will see who we were meant to be

Worship

Extravagant:

1.spending much more than is necessary

2.excessively high

3.exceeding the bounds of reason, as actions, demands, opinions, or passions.

4.going beyond what is deserved or justifiable

5.Obsolete. wandering beyond bounds.

The LORD's love is extravgant!

Your love is extravagant

Your friendship, it is intimate

I feel I'm moving to the rhythm of Your grace

Your fragrance is intoxicating in the secret place

Cause Your love is extravagant

Spread wide in the arms of Christ is the love that covers sin

No greater love have I ever known that

You considered me a friend

Capture my heart again

Your love is extravagant

Your friendship, it is intimate

I feel I'm moving to the rhythm of Your grace

Your fragrance is intoxicating in the secret place

Cause Your love is extravagant

Spread wide in the arms of Christ is the love that covers sin

No greater love have I ever known;

You considered me a friend

Capture my heart again

Your love is extravagant

Your friendship, it is intimate.....

I've been thinking about worship lately, and how when we get in times of sorrow, and we feel lost and distant from the LORD, we need to push though and seek truth. I've been feeling like this for the last while. It's been hard to get into worship, and I've let myself get distracted. It seems to hard to let go of things, but God has already loosen those chains, we just need to let them go. It's so hard, but it's something we need to do.

LORD I pray that you just make your presence know and felt. Help in this battle! Give me strength, and encouragment, as I fight for your prasie!

More pics!!

Pics!!

Everywhere.......

My head seems to be everywhere... I'm truly on an emotional roller coaster. I'm having some feelings of me being such a burden. It's hard, because I can't do as much as I would like to, but I just don't have time, or ability to. I just feel frustrated. Like a huge rock dropped on me, and I can't get it off until someone helps me...I'm just so hurt.
I apologize to whoever reads my blog, for all this non-insightful stuff, but I feel sometimes it's just somewhat of release for me.

Overflow from my heart...

Just to warn anybody who cares, this blog isn't really insightful or revealtion filled... my my heart is overflowing with pain... so I will let it out here....
Life is just really complicating right now, I feel so scared, even though I try hard to trust in God knowing that he has a plan for my life... However, I just am worried about the outcome of teh situations in my life will be.. from people who love me, who just don't understand what is going on in certain situations, to just having so much going on that makes the situation harder....
I just feel my life is in a whirl wind, everything I couldn't possibly imagine happening to me is happening, it just goes to show how messed up things can be...
I just want to be so close to God right now, except I just feel held back by something... but I just can determin what.... I just really want things to stop... I want things to be different... I wish I could be somewhere else...
I'm just sad and hurt and need God right now.... Help me LORD I pray.